The Honest Life

A blog about living an honest life filled with success, happiness, struggle, and most importantly, LOVE!

Learn to Live Alone And You’ll Never Be Alone

I was reading a blog post by a woman named Liz Lebedda entitled “Navigating Support Systems” (really great article, check it out here – last night and it really got me thinking about the importance of learning to be alone comfortably.

Many times in my life I’ve had friends come to me complaining about how horrible it is to be single. They stress out and worry themselves sick over finding someone to court everywhere we go. If we go out for drinks, they’re looking for someone. If we grab a quick bite at Panera, they’re looking for someone. There is never a time when we can just sit down and enjoy each other’s company without them worrying about dating, relationships, or finding a significant other.

Personally, I love being single. For me, it’s not that I’m not good enough or that I’m not funny enough, or smart enough to have a girlfriend; I see it as an opportunity to learn to love myself. In the last 6 months, I’ve learned more about myself then I could have ever imagined. I learned what I loved about myself and also what I wanted to improve. And from there I took action to change what I didn’t particularly care for. And when the time is right, I’ll be ready for a relationship, because I am perfectly comfortable and happy without one.

In it’s essence, my friends constantly complain because they feel inadequate without someone by their side. They feel that they are better, funnier, happier, stronger, and countless other things when they have a girlfriend by their side. This is the exact reason why we need to learn to live alone.

There’s a beautiful quote that’s always brought to mind whenever a situation like this arises.

You’re never alone if you love who you’re alone with.

– Unknown

Why is it that we put so much emphasis on the necessity of having a mate? Take the time to learn to love yourself, just like you learn to love others in your life and you will never truly be alone. Remember this quote next time you’re having trouble accepting the single life, and I think you’ll be just fine.




8 comments on “Learn to Live Alone And You’ll Never Be Alone

  1. Scott Charles Rogers
    August 16, 2012

    I just recently am single and I fully endorse this message. I am not trying to find someone new, but after first analyzing what was I responsible for and deciding what I need to work on for myself, I am putting down those broken pieces, and getting back to living. I love life. I love my friends. I love my hobbies. Many people think a relationship is a measure of success in life, but it is just another element. Thanks for that awesome quote!

    • thehonestlifeblog
      August 16, 2012

      Thanks for sharing Scott! As you said, a relationship isn’t a measure of success in life, it’s just an addition to the beauty of it.

  2. Chulani Iddawela
    August 16, 2012

    I totally agree with you!! I always love to be alone. & I thought i’m the only person who think like that. guess I was wrong. 🙂

    • thehonestlifeblog
      August 16, 2012

      You’re never alone, Chulani. As long as you love who you’re alone with : )

  3. Mark Petruska
    August 16, 2012

    You know what? I often say I didn’t really learn how to live until I learned how to live alone! Well put, and I agree 100%.

  4. Liz Lebedda
    September 3, 2012

    Thanks so much for linking to my blog! I’m glad you liked what I wrote, and I’m with you! If you love yourself, you will never be alone.

  5. Pingback: Moving Forward into True Happiness « The Honest Life

  6. Leo
    October 7, 2013

    Your post and all the replies are very supportive. Sometimes I put too much emphasis on having that someone in my life to authenticate “who I am” without even knowing it. I think I created in myself a need for co-dependency although on certain levels not all across the board. My truth is I’ve in fact been alone for the full duration. I mean my passion for music was never really accepted and attacked even more as success developed. And even though she would lend occasional aid to household projects I had to push to get them done as it seems she always had some sort of reason why I should stop midstream to give her the attention she demanded. I’ve been living with an obsessive compulsive personality on and off for 26 years of marriage so yes I care, but the truth is I can’ allow myself to care beyond reason and yes she definitely had a problem with that!

    I’m learning to live alone knowing that I’m alone so I must give myself plenty of love. Most of what I do is alone anyway like recording full compositions, researching everything that goes into the business, learning it and using it! Doing all of my own pages simply because she doesn’t approve of my growth in this area amongst others I might add. After all is said and done peace of mind is within grasp and I will have it in full after getting over the ridiculous hump I’ve created in myself of relying on her presence to authenticate myself. I dunno!l see..!

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